The Yellow Chick

That's me... the yellow chick... the one left behind.  Here's the email I received from my agency this morning. (sigh)

Hi, April! 
I was so sorry to hear you did not get your TA last week--how difficult
it must have been to hear so many families got theirs and you did not. I
don't know why yours didn't come (or the other family's); I have not yet
had a chance to read the correspondence from last week from our Beijing office to see if there was anything stated in that information (this is how we receive updated information on children, etc.) I will do that
today and let you know if there is any information listed there or not.
If not, I will certainly ask today if they can find out anything. It
often happens that some families in a group do not get theirs when
others do; that is unfortunately not uncommon.
Yes, I can relate to what you are saying about the spiritual end; I am
sorry you have had other things going on in your life at the same time.
I have no idea when your TA will arrive, but again, will most certainly
check today and get back with you as soon as possible. Again, I will
let you know if last week's correspondence contained any information about
your situation. I am so sorry, April! I will be in touch asap!

On a different note, I have often learned the hard way that God's timing is always best.  I think I have said this before, but with so many years of walking with the Lord, you would think I could quit reminding myself of this fact.  I believe life is boot camp.  It is a test and a preparation for the "real" life that follows this one.  When things don't go the way I think they are going to go or the way that I want them to go, I tend to let my circumstance rule my emotions.  I'd probably not have this test so often if I wouldn't shut down and feel sorry for myself in situations like this one.  I really believe God sees the big picture.  He loves me and sees things that I can't see. 

A couple of years ago, there was an issue with a friend.  The friendship became weird and I felt really hurt and rejected.  It bothered me for a full year.  I prayed and prayed and prayed about it.  I asked God to restore the friendship, etc...  After awhile, I knew that it was not going to happen.  I also had a feeling one day I was going to understand.  Well, at the end of that torturous year, events unfolded that explained everything.  Never could I have imagined in my wildest dreams what unfolded and I wouldn't wish the details on my worst enemy.  After I had some time to process the situation, I will never forget the love that I felt envelop me from God.  The whole time He was trying to protect me.  If God had answered my prayer the way that I prayed it, I would have been immersed in a situation that would have been infinitely more painful.  See, God can see the big picture.  He loved me enough not to give me what I had asked.  I will always take God's plans over mine.

So, now that I have had some time to get my thoughts down, I like being the yellow chick.  Besides, the yellow chick is much cuter!!:-)